You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
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