Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Need sex. Gaining weight.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
