Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
