i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
This can only be settled by a dance off.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
Randomize
