i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Randomize
