Hey man sorry I got all grabby
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize