return my video game
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
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you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
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Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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