I wish I could punch you in the face.
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
either way he was missing a nipple.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize
