you're like a bully in the Christmas story
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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