question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
