i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
