would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
