To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
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As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
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Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Success! We fucked roommates!
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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