I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
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