Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
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