I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
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