guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Randomize