'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
