you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
there was a trapeze. enough said
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize