Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
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