Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
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i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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