you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
