question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
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