Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
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