im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
Randomize
