I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I stole a fireplace last night.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
