I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
