You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
