I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
we're so committed to being not committed
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
