haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
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