How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
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