so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
Randomize
