Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
