I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
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