Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
So. Much. Porn.
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