Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
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