Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
