i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
