There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
