I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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