I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
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