I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Randomize
