YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Randomize
