If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
