Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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