omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
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