Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
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I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
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I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
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