Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
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