Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
they need to just BURY HIM!
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
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