Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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